Pizza Party Aftermath has changed their band name. BEHOLD! Mathemortician.
May
22
Trip Audrey played “overseas” at the Manette in Bremerton on 2/22/2008.
May
22
The Light Brigade has finally settled on a new band name: Trip Audrey. I like it. I like it a lot, actually. They did good.
May
22
August 16, 2007
Fuschia FoXXX, Hidden Number, and Jake Merriman perform, originally uploaded by suswar.
YIPEE! The long anticipated first album, Burn Alive, is now available on CD Baby, iTunes, Magnets Large and Small, and in lots of CD stores, too! It has 10 tracks including Dearmachine, Sum of None, Wake Up Little Mendoza, and KickFite which you can hear on the MySpace website.
May
22
The Light Brigade @ The Rainbow in Seattle * October 21, 2006
“She had to go for the beautiful, natural thing that happens between a man and a woman.”
Kai and I went to dinner at Araya’s before the show and fought about whether or not to get a housekeeper. I say yes. My quality of life is suffering and the mildew in our shower is resistant to bleach. Is that normal for mildew? I don’t even know, which is precisely why we need housekeeping assistance from a professional. Kai seems to think we can clean our own one bedroom apartment without incorporating and hiring a staff. I’ll believe it when I see the shower sparkle. At any rate, this is probably why most musicians don’t bring their families on tours with them.
From Araya’s we headed down the street to the Rainbow to get ready for the show. I didn’t catch the name of the opening band because I was distracted by the World Championships of Paintball on the TV at the back of the bar. Which is rude of me, but I didn’t choose the channel.
It was a small crowd, so I took advantage of the opportunity to heckle the band, mostly about their inopportune tuning. I tried to get a drunk girl to dance, but she informed me that she had to “go for the [rhymes with block]” and then tried to give me a goodbye kiss. I suppose I should have just given her a peck on the cheek, but I didn’t know what she was doing so I defensively turned my face and she smashed into my glasses leaving them blurry with face grease.
The band played two new songs that I hadn’t heard them do before: Make It Rain, which was a cover and a damn good one that Josh the singer really leaned into; and Elementary Man which is simply new and probably two albums away from release.
The Light Brigade has been planning to change their name for as long as I’ve known them. They think they may have finally settled on a replacement and this may have been their last show under the old name. Hopefully it won’t be long until the album comes out and Tshirts are printed, and then I’ll be employed again with a table of merch to guard and push.
May
22
“Oh, Jesus.”
“Pizza Party Aftermath”, originally uploaded by suswar.
Hidden Number & PPA
Blue Moon 7/21/2006
I didn’t really sell anything at this show. There was an area just in front of the stage with logo emblazened fleece blankets, Xmas stockings, and T-shirts, but it just isn’t gift buying season I guess. Hopefully sales will resume once Hidden Number finishes their album–which should be anytime now since it was “nearly done” about this time last year.
This was the best HN show in terms of showmanship! The band all wore costumes and Dean’s keyboard setup and white labcoat made him look like some sort of mad scientist leading his army of test-tube freaks into the frontlines of rock. The only thing missing was smoke and maybe a giant fly.
I didn’t have anything to sell for Aftermath either, but there was still plenty of work to be done for the only roadie of three bands! Between Hidden Number’s set and Aftermath, I went out to the van to help apply wigs, thorny crowns, and stigmata to the Jesuses. It was actually a huge pain in the ass. It took five times longer than it should have for the second band to take the stage and I have no idea why. Most of the equipment was already set up since two thirds of the members where in the first band. Also, the guys were stress monkeys for no discernable reason. It was really late and super hot. At one point during the show, I thought Kai was passing out because the wig was trapping all the heat in his head which he’s not used to. It looked like he was about to fall forward over his set, but it turned out he was just feeling the spirit. I almost ran on stage to catch him. That would have been embarrassing. People would have thought I was some sort of Jesus groupie. I am definitely not a Jesus groupie. Especially when Jesus is bleeding from the mouth. Why was Jesus bleeding from the mouth?
May
22
“I should NOT have worn my Microsoft shirt.”
< — This image is by artist Chuck Sperry and can be found on various products from Alternative Tentacles Records (http://www.alternativetentacles.com).
New Years 2004, Kai and Dean took me to Nuemos to see Jello Biafra’s scrotum. Actually, the scrotum was sort of a bonus as the guy is a sloppy mooner. I didn’t know anything about Jello Biafra, but it turns out, I should NOT have worn my Microsoft shirt as he is a punk activist anti-corporate rock god. We were some of the first people in and I headed straight to the merch stand to buy something to cover my mistake before anyone decided to kick my ass. I pushed by some guy that looked like Sideshow Bob to get there, who Kai later pointed out to me as one of the members of the band. I think I said something dumb to him as I shoved past him in my Microsoft T-shirt, but I don’t remember exactly what. I was on a mission. I bought a shirt with an image of George bush wearing a thorny crown of oil wells that says “Bush Hates Me”. This is still my favorite shirt two years later.
The best part of this show was one of the opening bands–The Makers. Well, really it was Dean’s heckling of The Makers. These guys were all purple-rained out in their best blouses and high heeled boots. The lead singer, we’ll call him Prince, had a tambourine that he played relentlessly and with great drama. After a few songs, Dean (who had been drinking heavily), started yelling “more tambourine! More tambourine!” Dean can be very loud and Prince could totally hear him. Prince was getting pissed. This is my second favorite rock show moment (following “Fresh and New”).
Anyway, it was the perfect way to ring in the New Year, full of healthy hatred toward the president and thus full of optimism for the future of the country.
May
22
October 15, 2006
“How embarrassing, I’m wearing the same dress as Sister Mary.”
Kai took me to see operation:mindcrime II at the Moore tonight. That’s right, Queensryche! I had never heard the concept album before, but as far as I can tell, the story is that this priest develops a strain of heroine that allows him to control people’s minds whenever he calls them and says “mindcrime!” into the phone. He gets all the nuns hooked on heroine and then sends them out into Seattle to get all the young boys hooked as well. The lead singer of Queensryche becomes a client of Sister Mary who is secretly a dirty whore on her day off. They fall in love but because he’s a troublemaking anarchist, the priest phones Sister Mary one day and says “mindcrime! Put a gun in your mouth and pull the trigger!” Which she does, because it’s a mind crime. Then, the heartbroken lead singer of Queensryche gets framed for the murder and goes to jail for 18 years. When he’s freed, he puts on a suit and kills three lawyers. He finds the priest and crashes into his limo with his motorcycle in an alley behind The Rendez Vous but doesn’t get hurt as bad as the priest who was in the limo. He drags the priest into his industrial loft and kills him. Then he sits on the couch trying to decide whether to kill himself and how he might kill himself–with a sledgehammer? No. With cigarettes? No. Too slow. With a noose? This goes on for three songs, with the ghost of Sister Mary pulling her hair out hoping he doesn’t do it. Then he overdoses on heroine and is reunited with the whore/nun and they descend into hell happily ever after.
This was an awesome show. The trip to the ladies room was a little disturbing, though. I had to wait in line behind fifty year old women with missing teeth in black leather mini-skirts. But who can blame them for loving a band that can put on this sort of cheesy show and still pull off cool? The best part was the marching band that came on stage during two songs. The theater was packed and it was extra exciting seeing as how Queensryche is a local band (Jet City==home of Boeing). It was total old school rock n’ roll and I’m glad Kai dragged me along.
In addition to operation:mindcrime I & II, the band also performed an encore of Walk in the Shadows and Jet City Woman.
May
22
October 25, 2004
Since graduating from college in June, I have been looking for a job. In other words, emailing my resume into the dark void of cyberspace between games of minesweeper while eating potato chips in my bathrobe and slippers. In part I blame myself. I majored in linguistics, which, unless you want to continue to grad school and spend your summers with Dr. Joe in a remote African village cataloguing fifty ways to say ‘we’re having dung beetles for dinner again tonight’ in clicks, does not present a lot of job opportunities.
And in part I blame society for not recognizing and exploiting my usefulness in the private sector. Kudos, though, to the armed forces who saw right away my value and potential as target practice for opposing armies even before I finished high school. I’m not saying I haven’t considered becoming an army of one, I most certainly have, it’s just that I’m a picky eater and I’ve heard they frown on that in the front lines. Plus, the fact remains that although I’d like to be all I can be, I’d like to do it after my morning latte and still be home in time to see how many fish Rupert catches this week on Survivor.
With my skills and qualifications, my phone should be ringing off the hook with job offers in middle management, enigmatic cubicle work, and government offices. So far, I’ve only had one interview. I met with a dentist to discuss my qualifications for answering phones and making patients in the waiting room feel safe over the screams and cries of her other victims. She asked such hard hitting interview questions as ‘when did you go to the dentist last?’ And ‘what kind of experiences have you had with dentists?’ Although I tried to flatter her with my admission that she was the first dentist I had met that I hadn’t bitten, thrown up on or spit all over, she ultimately decided on another candidate.
One of the worst things about not being able to find a job is that everywhere you go you encounter people who have them. I’ve tried to look at these people as potential suggestions for jobs I could try to get. For instance, when I go up the street to get a cup of coffee I think ‘hey, _I_ could charge people five dollars for a grande low fat mocha even though they ordered a soy latte.’ And when I go out to eat I think ‘hey, I could bring people cold french fries and not refill their drinks! Why don’t _I_ have this job?’ When I called customer service after receiving an error on a job application website, I thought ‘yeah, I don’t know how this program works either! Are you hiring?’
I do have some advice for my fellow job seekers though. I’ve been searching through job descriptions in online databases, company websites, and newspaper classifieds. From what I’ve seen, there are 3 types of ads the job searcher has to sort through. First, is the ‘make $1000/week from your living room’ ad. This sort of ad promises you that by simply stuffing envelopes in the comfort of your own home, you can achieve the financial freedom you’ve always dreamed of – if that financial freedom includes cutting coupons to use as toilet paper. Avoid these ads unless your spouse is making enough money to support you through your midlife crisis.
The second type of ad will have a title such as ‘customer development and manufacturing specialist position available in the food and hospitality industry’. The job qualifications include things like ‘excellent oral and written communication skills, sincere interest in the food and hospitality industry, motivated self-starter and team player, experience in financial development and marketing preferred.’ If you take the bait and click on the link to submit your resume online, you will spend the next four hours navigating through an online application for a position flipping burgers at a fast food chain.
The third ad you’ll encounter is listed under the heading ‘wdm seeking sexy sf 20s n/s height weight proportionate for friendship and more?’ This ad is misplaced and it would be unwise to contact the employer for salary information.
You have no chance at getting any of these positions. Your best bet is to encourage your friends to find success in their jobs so that they can be promoted to a position where they are in charge of hiring. Looking around at your friends, this may seem unlikely to happen. You might want to meet new people. Try placing an ad such as the third example above.
